These first few days I’ve been on an emotional roller coaster. I thought about not writing this, but I want to be transparent and who knows, maybe the Lord can use this in your life.
I thought I came in with no expectations, but I was wrong. I was talking with one of the volunteers and was reassured that I’m not the only one who struggled with being here at the beginning. I keep asking if 3 months is too long. I’ve been very emotional since I got here and making a decision based on emotions is not a good idea.
I know that God has me here for a purpose and right now it’s difficult to trust in that. John 13:7 says “Jesus answered him (Peter), ‘What I am doing you do not understand now, but afterward you will understand.’” This particular verse in context is about Jesus washing the disciples’ feet and Peter was asking why the Lord was getting down doing this dirty job. I’m confused too why the Lord has me here. This brings to mind James 1:2-4, “Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.”
I’m going through this trial so that I can be made complete in Christ. It has nothing to do with me…I’m a selfish individual and if I had it my way would never have come here. Or I would have made sure I had all the details straight before hand. It’s a foreign country, things are done differently here…I know that. So, why am I expecting this place to be run as if we were still in America?
“Go with the flow, be flexible” is my mantra right now. I still don’t know everything I’m supposed to be doing or what expectations they have of me working with the babies. With that said, here are 10 reasons to stay for 3 months:
Joan (pronounced JoAnn)
I will be dedicating one blog post to each of these precious babies.
Thank you if you are praying for me. As you can see above, I desperately need it! Please don’t feel sorry for me…I just wanted you to get a glimpse of the struggles I am battling right now and hopefully will be able to show how God will work in and through me in the very near future regarding this trial!